• What is the borderline personality disorder?
- It is what we call a personality disorder
(there are about a dozen)
  .
• What is a personality disorder ?
- When a person is not able to face and to manage problems with others. When he is not able to adapt to changes, to stresses then, he or she have a personality disorder

• More precisely how do the symptoms occur ?
- By rages, emotional reactions exaggerated not in connection with the situation. "But why he reacts like this?"
- the person will have moment of euphoria where all seems to be very well and by moments opposite (insolation)
- He will have tendency to loneliness, to live in a cocoon
- He will divide the world into two camps:
• The "goods", those which do exactly what he wants (its "slaves")
• The "bad ones", those which for example will say to him "no"
- We can say that these people have an emotional quotient of child, that they often react as would do a 5 years old child, whereas they have intelectual capacities like everyone
Of course it is not their "nature" but the consequences of the disease
(Explaining page)

• What are the alarms signs, the behaviors "odd" which can worry, they appear when and how?
- the disease generally appears during adolescence or the adulthood beginning
But when to say "this time it is really not normal, it would be necessary to him to consult a therapist"
Quite simply when in a repeated way we think that a person reacts in a "crazy" way (impulsive behaviors, relationships...)

• What are the differences with narcissistic ?
- the narcissistic one, loves himself, he needs a court, it rather tends to have an absence of empathy for others
- the borderline, it is the opposite, he is an over-emotional person. he does not even like him, he suffers enormously. he does not require to be admired but to be reassured
We should'nt forget that they are human beings, patients, victims and that they should not be often blamed for their behaviors in extreme cases of the bearable one. They need compassion, love, empathy AND care

• "the borderline disorder is it to have some problems or is it a true disease "
- This has nothing to do with the "nature" of the person, it is a true disease, even a serious illness, chronic as well as the diabete. The DSM IV give the definition
(hundreds of studies, of publications throughout the world proves it)
... And a sick person, we treat her

• Is it necessary to have all the symptoms to be "borderline" ?
Of course not !
We have to keep in minf that the "borderline" are first persons, human being who suffer. In that capacity, they are all differents
Not all the persons will cute, self harm or commit suicide
Some persons will act-out by rages, dangerous behaviors and some will act-in
Some will have the possibility to hide their problems and some, more sicks, will not have the possibility to hide their suffering.
In all cases, the Borderline peoples have problems to manage their emotions
See know more

• We all are "borderline"
No
We can all have by moment some "traits" of the borderline disorder but it is a question of "proportion" and "duration"
Telling that is:
- obscurantism!
- ignorance of the disease!
Yes indeed the association has one's work cut out to erase this lie from the head of those which think that
Sadly there is still in France, french speaking countries (and over the world) very many mental health providers, even psychiatrists who don't know their job
We really need to suppress from people's head the idea that a psychiatrist considers that we are all sick, it is not true. (on the other hand some are, like princess diana)
There are people in good health (with the more or less significant problems in her life) and sick peoples for whom the disease is a true handicap

It is true that the word "borderline" is really a bad idea. This comes from the 1940-50th when the psychiatrists thought that this disease was in extreme cases between the neurosis and the psychosis . Since the diagnosis refined itself but the name remained. Some suggest "Emotional Disregulation Disorder "

• Is there treatment, cure?
- Yes, with both drugs for precisely limiting these inappropriate reactions but also by a therapy
It is not certain that we can speak about "cure" but we could compare this with diabete
"diabetic without insulin dies, diabetic with insulin has a complete and well adjusted life"

• how we get this disease?
- Not like a flu, we cannot speak about "contagion".
We needs several factors
• First of all, the person must have biological, genetic predispositions inherited which we could describe as over-sensitiveness
• But to contract the disease, it is necessary that in the very early childhood, this person was subjected to some events counter acting her "normal" development (that can be serious events like physical or sexual abuses, traumas, a serious disease but also an home environment in which the child could not learn how to build himself, to think by himself, to express her angers, her needs, her feelings)
Attention, it is of course quite "natural" wanting to know the reasons of the disease but to be clear "we don't care" "What imports is to cure the flu, not to know where and how it was contracted!"
• How to react when we face the patient, which behaviors to adopt and which behavior to banish?
- We should not fall in her game
The most frequent error, in particular because we has feelings for the person is to authorize her to have behaviors which we would'nt admit from a person in good health.
Its statute of patient should not be accompanied by a statute of handicapped person
It is not to the "borderline" to fix her limits but the circle which must affirm "Here are the limits not to be exceeded"
If the consequences are to make him angry, let him do, in all the ways it is better that he externalize his feelings
But he should not have the feeling that his disease gives him all the rights such as to be for example horrible with one's family (whereas in same time, for other peoples, the patient will be able to pass almost for a saint)
In the same time, we always have to keep in mind that the borderline is a victim who suffer, so we always have to treat him / her with compassion and empathy

• It is cruel to make suffer the person, to ask him to act in such a way which he cannot achieve.
• Why not leave them in "peace" ? he or she lives "well" like that... he or she has his her little happinesses...
- Good question indeed
"Why not to leave your child with his flu, why not to leave him rather than make him punctures which make him suffer?"
"Why not to leave one of your blind close relations whereas you learned that it is not irreversible and that there is an operation which could make him recover the eyesight?"
- the life of a borderline is a daily hell (even if he has some breaks, even if he dissimulates his suffer) .
- the person suffers and expresses her suffering by rage, either externalized (what is no more badly) , either interiorized (much serious because it is invisible)
In the more serious cases, that goes to the cut and sometimes to suicide . The goal being each time to calm his pain
In all cases it is certainly not to the family circle to take the place of the patient to prevent him from treat himself (whatever are "the good" reasons like the risk to suffer a "defeat", the "suffering" of the treatment...)

• But "when I speak to him, he says to me that he is well, that he does not have anything "
- Ask one heroin junkie if he has tear with this one or if it took only one time and he can stop when he wants
You do not "need" the person to make your own opinion on the reality of the situation
It is blindingly obvious that the sick person is not "like everyone"!

ll is necessary to keep in mind that the patient is a "born liar". It is one feature of the disease (but also in a majority of  mental illnesses) , but bpd patients are intelligent and have the capacity to hide the disease when needed, they won't be able to resist. Besides that allows them to avoid hospitalization but does not take away anything with their suffering which is quite real.
During periods of doubt, of taking a newlook at ourself "is he really sick ?" it is always necessary to keep in mind the globality of the borderline's life "is her life, like everyone ?" and give up the theory "he is not responsible, they are all fault of everyone but him". It is nevertheless rare that the theory of the plot appears to be real
In all the ways if he was not really sick, we wonder why he would refuse to see a therapeutist qualified to get rid of doubts
 

• I don't understand, they know that they are sick or not ? And if they know it why they don't decide to see a doctor ?
- Initially the family can sometimes have a very bad influence (on the basis of a good feeling) while saying "but no my darling, you don't have anything, these are others which are responsible for YOUR situation, not you"
But also keep in mind:
- Yes, it is true that the patient suffers, he knows that
- Yes, it is true that he knows that he is "not like everyone", the proof being that he's using camouflage strategies
(a person not with the awareness of her own situation would be "special" all the time and would not be aware to hide the illness)
Problem
The problem is that he does not think that it is a disease but that is her "nature"
In this case "why I would see a doctor who will say to me that I am like this and that we can't change nothing"
Worse than this (here the importance of the AAPEL ), he will have perhaps already seen some "psychiatrists" but by ignorance of the disease will not have brought any help to him and even in certain cases will have degraded its situation
.
• How to convince him her to treat himself herself ?
- Strangely, the more the person will be sick, the more it will be easiest to treat her
Indeed, more she will be sick and more she will have difficulties to hide her disease and more she will have pressure from her entourage to see a doctor
In case of a high functioning patient, he will be able to deceive most of the entourage, condemning him to the suffering
.
• Concretely what to do?
- That passes by information.
The entourage must cease being a cocoon
The entourage must cease thinking and deciding for the person
The entourage must say to the patient their truth, what they think about him / her (with compassion)
It is necessary to give to the patient, the possibility of being informed on the disease, in particular while going to read serious information on our site.
So That he could say "but I am not alone like this!"
The goal is to have the patient wanting to see a specialist of the disease (or in all cases a person able to direct him / her to a real specialist)

There are certainly several steps in the self awareness

• The "I have no problem"
It is not very probable when we talk about the borderline disorder. Indeed, peoples have on the whole, dissimulation's strategies (and we can't hide what we don't know)
• The "I have a problem but i don't speak of this to anybody. If somebody talk to me about this then I deny"
Self defense principle directly connected to a lack of confidence to others (so to them) and because of next point
• The "I not like everybody, it's my nature, I am the only one like this, and nobody can't help and change anything"
This is logical. If it is their "nature" we will not change it and we will have to deal with.
Why make him / her suffer for nothing
The "problem" or "chance" is when we speak about the borderline disorder, we speak about a real disease, not about "nature"
• The "I know that I have problems mais I had already seen a lot of doctors. Last time, I was more sick after than before, so why to do it again !"
Logical and the association has a lot of work. It is criminal to let Borderlines peoples not or wrongly diagnosed
In short, we have to keep in mind that a person could reach "in his / her head" at some "stage" but in a previous stage in his / her speech.
It is not easy at all to detect
As much as possible we have to don't put the cart before the horse.
It is preferable to let the sick people saying "I have a problem, I will consult a specialist" and not the circle to say "go to see a doctor"
- If he she really think to have nothing then it is really serious like schizoprenia, you should talk about this to a mental health provider
- If he she is conscious, and even if he she is a liar, we need to be honnest with him her and not lie "I think that you have a problem" and the give him  her the tools to get informations about the disease like going on our web site
This to say to him her "I think that you have this disease and i have read that there is a treatment" or "I had the feeling that the site was talking about you, you should go and read to form your own opinion".
The goal is not to convince him her to see a doctor but to convince him her that it is not their "nature" to be like this but a real disease.
Furthermore, a disease with treatments available with the help of the "right' therapist
If we cross these two stages (the conscious et the fact it is a disease), there is no more reason for the person to don't have the willing to treat
.
• What are the possible scenarios if we do nothing ?
Each person is unique and no one know the future
We can see:
• Status quo.

The sick person continue to "live" his her "none life" with low and high episodes, he she continuing to suffer...
• An improvement.

Somes will be better by themselves. Better but probably not to a real recovery. It is uselles to say that they will suffer until this time during many years
• ... And the worse...

The worse is part of this disease (read the informations about suicide). They will not decide to kill themselves because they no more want to live but because they no more want to suffer

..